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Topic Title: post surgical depression
Created On: 10/27/2004 10:46 AM
 10/27/2004 10:46 AM

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In August I had a triple orthrodesis performed on my right foot. I had completely torn my posterior tibialis which is the tendon that holds up your arch. The surgery which lasted four hours involved fusing two bones in my foot that puts the in the right position (arch-wise) and eliminates the tendon completly. The foot was placed in a non-weight bearing cast for 6 weeks and a removable boot for another 6 weeks, The removable boot comes off in two weeks and then I have at least 9 months of rehab before I am relatively pain free. I will never again have full range of motion with the foot but at least it will be better than before the surgery and when the foot was in an on and off period (five years) of tendonitis . I initially injured the foot five years ago and have had it as well as the other foot in and out of casts several times. I had always feared the surgery because of the adage that if you could avoid having surgery on you foot do so as the outcome of surgery is very tricky. When the tendon snapped I had no choice and that is when the fear and subsequent depression/anxiety started. In addition, I had a difficult time identifying a qualified surgeon who could not only obtain my condfidence to perform the surgery but one who could schedule it in a reasonable time period. Needless to say the ordeal consumed me during the time leading up to the surgery and for at least 6 weeks after the surgery when I was out of the cast and into the boot. I realize I was depressed abotu what the recovery would be like, how was I going to get around and tend to daily functions like bathing, meal preparation, etc. With the support of my girl friend and housekeeper and friends I managed better than I feared but the rigor and its discomfort made me disconsolate and even depressed. Initially all I wanted to do was lay in bed and be left alone. It was a chore to talk on the phone even. I had a hard time focusing on anything else and barely could handle the tasks that needed attention. I did so but enjoyment was absent. Recently my girlfriend ended our relationship because she did not think I attended to her needs and did not beleive that the surgery was a legitimate diversion. I told her I was depressed and fearful, SHE did not give that any credence. I know she is wrong and would love to find a device to convince her--like a research article. So if any one knows of such please share and of course advice is helpful. I am angry and sad. Perhaps I am better off.

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